Feminist Porn

I've become aware of a phenomenon known as 'feminist porn' and with the Belle Knox thing fresh in my mind it made me consider a few things about the nature of 'adult entertainment' and I thought I'd share some of those points with you right now.

I'm in two minds about porn. I recognise its utility and yet I'm frightened by its pervasiveness. I enjoy its fruits and yet there's a healthy dose of shame that goes along with that. Unfortunately, like most things that are things, it's a little more grey than black and white. Of course.

Porn is necessary. That's the fact of it. It's inevitable. From the time that man could capture image he has chosen (almost overwhelmingly) to capture the female form. Porn is available more now than it ever has been before and every single person in the western world has a porn production studio, transmitter and (most importantly) receiver right in their front pockets. It is a reality. There will never not be porn from this point onward. That is a fact we'd do better to just accept. 

Rodin liked himself a bit of ass (The Kiss, 1882-87)

Rodin liked himself a bit of ass (The Kiss, 1882-87)

Porn is useful. Not just from a sexual gratification and satisfaction purposes but from a female health and safety perspective. It's been well understood for a while that countries with access to pornography and legal sex workers experience far lower incidents of sexual violence and rape. The fact is, if you can twist one out in your apartment rather than trawling the streets for sex, you're probably going to. Some of the time, at least. I think that's a persuasive enough argument for its continued existence. 

Porn does misshape the way young men perceive and interact with women. I remember as a young boy watching porn almost as an instructional manual. I didn't grasp exactly what it was, or how it worked, but all of a sudden I understood how a penis went into a vagina and I knew it made my pants feel all fuzzy-good-feel-nice. I took what I was watching as fact, rather than a fantasy and I think schools would do well to have some instruction in this area. If you see a woman getting choked out enough you might just think that sort of thing is okay to do to a girl the first time you have sex with her.

'I didn't know that went in there!'

'I didn't know that went in there!'

And sometimes it is okay. And now this is where it gets tricky. Because you don't want to go down the road of shaming people for their sexual fetishes and preferences (if they have express consent) - but I do think too much of this kind of influence can defiantly be detrimental to the development of a young mind. If you have a particular rough sex preference or masochistic desires, that's okay. There's someone out there for you, I guarantee it. There's several. And if you're really lucky you can get them to meet each other. But the way porn is presented it makes it seem like this is the majority, and that's misleading. It can make men see women as simple sex objects rather than humans with thoughts and feelings and empathy - that's always going to have negative consequences.

I don't want to come across as some sort of bleeding-heart conservative. Some idiot that wants to hark back to some sort imaginary, fantasy past that has never existed anywhere in order to ensure the second coming of Jesus Christ or anything. That's not me. That's why I think 'feminist porn' or 'female friendly' (as perhaps a less loaded term) is such a good idea. I think it's the happy medium between the corrosive influence of hardcore cock-gagging-absurd-silicone-tits-degrading stuff that you normally see on the internet and the absurd unreality of abstinence teachings. 

Just how God made me, fellas.

Just how God made me, fellas.

'Female friendly' porn is usually very well shot, the woman get to chose their own partners and they don't look like barbies. They're natural, beautiful women having sex and enjoying it. You won't believe how shocked I was when I saw that for the first time. It's sad how shocked I was. I'd been watching porn for several years at this point and I realised that I'd seen a woman orgasm in a porno for the first time only then. The thing that I like about these 'female friendly' pornos is that the pleasure of the woman is actually considered. It's not just some phalli-centric misogynistic frat boy bullshit. It's not cock-sucking and then straight to anal. It's tender. It's loving. It looks like what sex is for a lot of people. 

I understand, people want fantasy. They want a blonde with impractical tits blowing them in a maid outfit on the moon, or whatever. It's not real. I get that. But I think people need to take a step back a have a think every now and then - is this the kind of thing that I want to be perpetuating and encouraging? I think that more female friendly porn that respects women is probably a step in the right direction. I'd personally like it to transcend the moniker and just become the norm - but as we all know, we always get just what we ask for and the internet these days seems to hate women pretty hard.

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